Bro, are you holiday hench? Are your mistletoe hanging muscles really up for the challenge of Liftmas? You better hope Santa’s *ss they are!
We’re about to put you through a Christmas workout that’ll get you Jacked-Frost faster than a pre-workout fueled reindeer. Have you seen that ripped AF snowman? He ain’t got no twigs for arms.
The Holiday Hench Workout
- Prowler push – 6 sets of 1 rep (12 meters)
- Farmer walks – 6 sets of 1 rep (15 meters)
- Power cleans – 4 sets of 6 reps
- Landmine squats – 3 sets of 10 reps
- Wood chops – 3 sets of 12 reps (12+12)
#1 – Prowler Push
6 sets of 1 rep (12 meters)
Rest: 60-120 seconds
Forget presents this year, we’re handing out a whole lot of pushin’ instead. Because when Santa comes knocking on your door to kickstart his sleigh you gotta be ready bro. It’s time to get Jacked-Frost with prowler pushes!
Load the prowler with a weight you can push the entire distance at an RPE of around 8.
How to do it:
- Take hold of the prowler handles high up near the top. Ensure both hands are at equal height with your knuckles facing outwards and arms straight
- Position your body into a low stance with your head tucked inside your arms
- Next, set yourself so your back is flat, and neck is in alignment. Once ready, brace your core, break at the knees, and come up onto your toes like a sprinter
- To get the prowler moving – drive through your toes using high knee strides. Make sure your feet keep facing forward, your core stays braced, and your arms do not bend
- Once you’ve pushed the prowler across the entire 30 feet stop, stand up straight, and rest before going again
#2 – Farmer Walks
6 sets of 1 rep (15 meters)
Rest: 60-120 seconds
Bro, there’s a reason Santa delivers all his presents in one night. Alpha-males simply do not do more than two trips! That means you’re gonna have to get your grip tighter than your mother in law’s giftwrapping to handle all those shopping bags.
If you’re a regular SpotMeBro reader, you know we’re a fan of the farmer walk. Not only do they build incredible present tearing grip, but a tighter fist than Scrooge’s wallet. We’re gonna suggest you grab a hold of two heavy AF kettlebells to simulate a bunch of stacked shopping bags.
How to do it:
- Stand with feet shoulder-width apart, with two kettlebells positioned either side of you
- Bend at the knees into a semi-squat so you can comfortably grab the handles. Once you have hold of them stand up straight, keeping a flat back and braced core – think of this motion as a deadlift
- Say to yourself ‘tall spine’ as you keep your back straight and eyes facing forward
- Take small steps as you walk all the way to your destination. Try not to stop or drop the weights as it’s the carry itself that is building your forearm and grip strength here
- Once you’ve passed the 15-meter mark, safely put down the kettlebells by bending at the knees in a reverse deadlift movement – keep your back straight bro
- Rest and go again for the entire rep range!
#3 – Power Clean
4 sets of 6 reps
Rest: 60-90 seconds
Carrying overflowing bags of gifts is one thing. But, having the power to load them into the trunk is another entirely! Nothing puts a bro on the beta-list faster than a failed shopping bag clean in the parking lot. Sorry, bro, Santa doesn’t hand out shiny new stringer vests to present dropping p*ssies.
Sleigh sets of power cleans to make sure it’s just as stacked under the tree as you yourself. You’ll build all the power needed to rip pounds of presents from the floor, throw them straight into the trunk, while still having the strength to fist bump Rudolph afterward.
How to do it: Set up
- Load an Olympic bar with bumper plates at a weight you could hit nine to ten reps with
- Stand facing the bar with your feet under it and at shoulder width. The bar should be somewhere over the top of your shoelaces
- Bend down and grab the barbell using a double overhand grip that’s slightly wider than shoulder width
- Keeping your arms straight, set your knees comfortably inside them somewhere near your elbows. From now on you’ll keep your arm straight until you hit the high pull
- At this point, the bar ideally wants to be an inch in front of your shins. Now, squat down by bending your knees, breaking at the hip, and positioning the hamstrings just above parallel with the floor
- Straighten your back and brace your core to prepare for the lift. Project your chest forward and engage your lats to stop rounding in the upper back
- Sit back into your heels and get ready to explode
How to do it: Lift
- Drive through the heels into triple extension – make sure to extend the ankles, knees, and hips in one fluent explosive movement
- As you push through your heels, bat your hips forward while raising your shoulders at the same time. It’s important that everything moves at the same speed to ensure safe alignment
- Once the bar passes knee height, explosively extend the ankles, knees and hips. You’ll most likely feel as if you’re jumping at this point, and might even take off from the floor
- Encourage the bar to rise in a straight line by shrugging your shoulders and raising your elbows to guide it – ideally, you’re looking to ‘pull’ the bar as high as possible so go all out
- Once the bar reaches its terminal height pull yourself under by rolling your elbows underneath it until they’re pointing out in front. From here, land with the bar in a front rack position and descend into a half-front squat. This will help decelerate the load and reduce the rate of impact on your joints
- Stand up straight and out of the squat to complete the lift
#4 – Landmine Squat
3 sets of 10 reps
Rest: 60-90 seconds
Everybody is expecting a big-ass bird to take center stage at the holiday table. That means you’re not only gonna have to be ready to load it into the oven but pull it out too, without spilling all its steamy goodness onto the kitchen floor.
Yup – it’s essentially the most important squat you’ll hit all year. No pressure, bro.
Because you’re gonna be facing the scorching heat head first, this squat is gonna be front-loaded. That means you’ve got to go for an exercise where the weight is positioned in front of you. Wait? You mean like a loaded landmine squat? Exactly, bro.
Choose a weight you can squat comfortably for 10-12 reps. Unless, of course, your turkey weights over 100 pounds…
How to do it:
- Take hold of the loaded landmine right at the end of the bar. Position it just in front of your chest like you would a goblet squat
- With your feet shoulder-width apart, drop into a squat by bending the knees and sitting your butt backward – brace your core and keep your back straight throughout the whole movement
- Keep descending until your hamstrings hit or pass parallel with the floor
- Take a second to pause at the bottom of your squat, then drive through your heels and midfoot to stand back upright
#5 – Wood Chops
Rest: 60 seconds
3 sets of 12 reps (12+12)
You can’t guarantee it’ll be a white Christmas bro, but it’s gonna be hella frosty. That means it’s your duty as an alpha-elf is to make sure nobody in the workshop gets cold. You gotta keep that log fire burning all day long, bro.
But, buying pre-chopped firewood is the most beta way to end up on the naughty list. Come on, what sort of beta-bullsh*t is that?
To get ready for taking out any tree, drill these wood chops on the double. Then, once you’re officially lumber-jacked, grab an ax like a real man and start swinging. Remember – Santa’s watching.
How to do it:
- Set a cable pulley to the highest position and attach a standard handle
- Standing side on to the pulley, grip the handle before taking a step away from the tower
- Now your arm is at full length, grab the handle with your other hand too
- Imagine you’re swinging an ax in one swoop – in one continual effort pull the cable down and across your body in a diagonal line
- Pivot on the back foot as the handle travels towards your knee. Also make sure to keep the back straight, arms straight, and core tight throughout the whole movement
- Reverse the pulling motion to return the cable slowly to the starting position
- Repeat steps 4-6 until you’ve hit all the reps before completing the same amount on the opposite side
There you have it, bro, the ultimate workout to get you holiday hench. Sleigh these sets back-to-back and snowball-proof your body for anything Christmas could throw at you. Wood chopping, turkey squatting, and gift grabbing – you’re about to put the mass in Christmass, bro.
Sorry, we don’t have anything to help with your crazy family. Reindeer yoga maybe?
Merry Liftmas bro!
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